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Keeping Up With Nobody

Am I the only one out here who is fed up with this instagram filtered, material worshipping, self promoting, crisp, sham of a world that is currently being shoved down my throat everytime I turn on the TV or login to whatever app I have the stomach for that day? Because I am about done with it.

One of the main reasons I shut myself off from the world of social media was because it caused a great amount of anxiety for me. When I was a teenager these things were 'fun'. Okay maybe not fun.... more like an uncontrollable compulsion. Taking time to come up with the perfect caption for the perfect photo (that took me at least 4-6 snaps to get), constantly checking my comments, how many likes I had garnered and ensuring that my feed was keeping up with my peers was a huge part of my life. There is a reason teenage girls have their phones in their hands at all times. It's an illness people.

But as I got older, I started to become overwhelmed by this perfect world being potrayed in front of me. Instead of looking forward to seeing what my friends were up to, or what was going on in the world of those enviable celebrities, I found myself comparing. How can my friends afford these glamourous vacations? I sure as hell can't. She is smiling and has perfect skin in every photo.... how is her hair not FRIZZY out there on the beach?

But after scrolling through what I am sure was hundreds of thousands of posts over several years, my suspicion eventually turned to self doubt. What is wrong with me that my life doesn't look like that? Why can't I afford these vacations? Well because you are lazy and don't work enough. Why are they always smiling? Well because they are normal and fun to around, you are anxious and a bore. Why don't Scott and I annouce our love for each other once a week in a post? Probably because they are happier than you and your relationship isn't as solid as you think. You are a massive pain in the ass you know. And the list goes on.

Until finally one day, I had enough. I started working on shutting down my addiction to comparing myself and internally completing with these impossible standards. Because the truth is, the majority of the images and posts out there do not represent something real. They represent an ideal.

So,the following is a PSA to all the badass people out there who are trying to hold it together.

  1. If you are able to get up out of bed in the morning and brush your teeth.... you're killing it. Seriously... I did a statistics report on this in university and you would be shocked at how many people do not brush their teeth for weeks on end. 1 in 3.

  2. And if you are able to get yourself in the shower at somepoint during the day, you are a fucking rockstar.

  3. Please, remember a lot of these woke parenting sites/blogs/instagram accounts are.... I'm just going to say it..... they are BULLSHIT. If you do not make your own baby food from scratch, it does not make you a bad mother. If you are unable -or simply do not want- to breast feed, there is nothing wrong with you. If you ever, even just for a fleeting moment, think that you made a huge mistake having a children.... THAT'S NORMAL. Don't let anybody tell you any different. Fuck off Karen.

  4. Trying to lose weight but it seems impossible? And the lady in the workout video is making you feel like crap because you were only able to make it through 15 minutes before breaking a massive sweat and needing to use you're inhaler, but somehow this youtube influencer is able to get through the full 90mins with ZERO pit stains... I'm gonna let you in on a little secret. SCREW HER, it's fake. It's editted/cut/filtered and you do NOT stand a chance at competing with that. So remember, the fact that you dedicated 15mins to your health and to yourself is a win. You should be fucking proud.

  5. Also, no one actualy LOVES the taste of a $12 green smoothie. There is nothing wrong with you.

  6. Having a mental illness is not a weakness. Seriously, it's not. And there are far more people around you struggling than you know. So never think you are alone, and ask for help when you need it. It's never a bother. There are people in your life who love you and want to help.

Since beginning to focus on what is around me and spending my energy appreciating all the wonderful things and people who are in my life, instead of competing with a sham, I have found a peace and happiness that I didn’t know I could have. I suggest you try it.

Well I will step off my soapbox now.... that is all.

Love, Kay


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