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We're Baking Bitches!

I love baking. I don't know why and I don't know how it happened. Actually... maybe I do. I think it has something to do with the preciseness of it all and there being no grey area. THESE are the ingredients, THESE are the measurements and THESE are the steps. No guess work. It's very soothing for my addled and sometimes exhausted brain.


And let's be honest, I love the finished product. There isn't much that chewy brownie or a scoop of cream cheese frosting can't make a little bit better. Annnnnnd now we are just going to glance over what an unhealthy relationship with food that is... because nobody got time for that.


So I have decided to share my amazingly delicious banana bread recipe with you. For those days when the world is closing in around you and the dread is taking over, take twenty minutes for yourself to prep it and toss it in the oven. Trust me... you will feel at least 2% better.


Now! My baking tips are pretty straight forward and simple. In fact I really only have one; follow the steps and, if you don't fuck it up, it should taste pretty good. Gosh I'm good.... like Martha Stewart minus the pretentious bullshit.


Kay's Amazingly Delicious and Simple Banana Bread.... You Will Need a Blender


Ingredients

-1/3 cup melted butter

-1/2 cup sugar

-3 very ripe and completely brown bananas. The grossest looking ones you can find.

-1 lrg egg... if you have a hook up like me, use a DUCK EGG. Otherwise chicken is just fine.

-2 tbsp ground gold flax

-1 tsp baking soda

-1 splash of vanilla

- 1 1/2 cup flour

- 3/4 cup mini chocolate chips....or any chocolate for that matter.


Steps

-Preheat oven to 350f. If you have a fancy stove I suggest convection...cause I am fancy like that.


-Throw all the ingredients in a large blender, EXCEPT for the flour and chocolate chips.


-Blend that sucker until it's smooth... It should almost have the consistency of milk.

(If you don't have a blender it's gonna be a lot of whisking. You should probably switch arms half way through)


-Stir in the flour and chocolate chips until just combined. But don't let your mind play tricks on you. You know... did I just put 1/2cup or a full cup of flour in.... wait did I forget the baking soda.... shit, its going to be ruined etc etc.


-Pour into a greased non stick loaf pan and bake for 1hr. Then turn the oven off and let the loaf sit in the oven while it cools. This is key!


-Tell all your friends about this blog and how it will change their life.


-And finally, eat half a loaf of banana bread in one sitting and then feel shame for the rest of the day :)



AND THAT my dears is how you make the best banana bread ever.


Love, Kay


PS- Scott is being super helpful and when I told him I was gonna let you all in on my banana bread secrets he said, "You should tell them that your bread is always under cooked. Like you never cook it right. So you should tell them that they should cook it a bit longer than you ever do". So ya. You heard it hear first folks. Scott is sleeping with the dog tonight.


PPS- Yes I am well aware that the photo is of lemon pie and not banana bread. But I don't have access to a nice picture of banana bread. And I do have access to the rights of a nice picture of lemon pie. Do you have any idea how much trouble you can get in for using photos you don't own without permission?? So you're just going to have to get over it.





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